With Friends like these...

Cheshire visits Flicktail and Oz in the infirm. Will either survive?

Flicktail lays in bed with his foot paw in a splint..hos armes crossed sitting up as he can't get out of bed

A truely miserable site, the champion of Redwall, waylayed and confined to a bed. It is then that the infirm is graced by the presence of one Cheshire Cat. A feline with a tuxedo pelt. Dressed in a simple tunic Cheshire looks...surprisingly healthy. His fur is glossy, the rings under his eyes are gone, he even has a bit of weight around his tummy.

The 'thing' he drags behind him however looks like it was spawned out of the dark forrest itself. The feline rolls in a skelleton of sorts attatched firmly to a base that roles across the floor. It's hard to say what the skelleton once belonged too, prehaps a bit of everything. Despite the stares he gets from other patients and fellow healers Cheshire seems unfazed and continues into the room whistling a merry tune.

Flicktail sits up "CHESHIRE! OMG CHESHIRE..I am So glad to...Chesire thatthing is COVERED in GERMS

Oz walks into the infirm and stops close to the door, hmms being blind has advantages it seems, "Hello?" He asks and rsises an eyebrow wandering whats going on in the infirm now.

The not quite fat cat turns his large green eyes towards the waylayed fox. He blinks once, twice. "Germs?" he laughs, "Oh this thing doesn't have any germs left, or at least not anything that could not survive ten or fifteen dumps into an acidic mixture." He says off handedly, then pauses in step. The...skelleton wobbles back and forth behind him. "BEHOLD! The protype of my masterpiece! Go on! Guess what it does!"

Flicktail says, "um Hi Pappa..." he looks at Cheshire "does it fly off roofs...wait CHESHIRE can't ye see I am INJURED?"

Oz just stands there listening, "Do I want to know what the feline has with him or is it better I do not?"

Cheshire waves his hand idly, as if dissmissing a child, "Oh please Flicktail, try not to hog the conversation. That's rude." He then turns back to his invention, "And I certainly hope it doesn't fly, I really do NOT want to spawn another flying mechanical zombie. No, this my friend, this is a Universal Beastial Analog! UBA for short."

Flicktail says, "it's better ya don't know Pappa....it looks liek old bones Chesh....can you elp me footpaw? I don;tthik i will lose th paw"

Oz frowns, he then speaks "Flicktail, it may be best Leon tends to your footpaw or Rayen prehaps"

Cheshire seems to be lost in a trance and ignores the fox and the blind badger. "Behold! For years healers everywhere have been plauged by a lack of a usable analog that can be applied to multiple species. The physical make up of a mouse can be different from a hares, or a fox's for example. This! This can be used to train new healers or act as a refrence for others in a wide variaty of situations! Just think of all the good it could do!"

A single tear escapes the cat's eye. Wiping it away he replies, "So what have YOU lot been up too for the past few months?"

Flicktail says, "nonsense Cheshire...we ave PLENTY of logs of ALL kinds......I hurt me FOOT PAW thats wot I been upto..."

Oz blinks slightly and shakes his head, but he stays put ...you know just in case.

The cat gasps, "You got hurt? Why didn't you TELL ME!?" The cat says, prehaps with the first signs of compasion creeping into his voice. "I could have used my analog for the first time!"

Flicktail says, "Well just LOOK at me footpaw..all swolen and funny shaped"

The feline twists his head and peers at the offending foot. "Hmmm, yep, I dare say that looks injured." The inventor folds his paws behind him as he paces around the fox. He looks him up and down, once or twice scratching at his own chin. Various forms of, 'hmmms,' come out of the cat. "How old are you Flick?" he asks out of no where.

Flicktail asks, "um I dunno, too old?"

The feline then proceeds to prod the fox in the side as he says, "And in what health? Would you say your fairly active? Overweight? Underweight?" Cheshire turns abruptly away afterward, lost in thought. There is the beginings of a slight grin upon his face. "Yes...yes that might work...but will the subject survive the procedure...?" he says to himself.

Flicktail shakes his head I think I am on me last leg Chesh...not lone ferthis world....

The inventor's grin spreads across his face. When he turns back to Flicktail his eyes flash from the candle light filling the room. "You don't say?" Clapping his paws together the cat slides up to the vulpine, "Exactly...how close to death would you say you are?" The cat would certainly never wish any harm upon the fox. The redwallers would not take kindly to the inventor bumping off their champion with an experiment. And for dubious moral reasons too...yes, Cheshire has morals, he just left them where ever he lost his marbles.

But if the fox was going to kick the bucket anyway...

Flicktail asks, "oh I ave one footpoaw inna grave andthe other on wet ice wouldn't ya says?"

Flicktail asks, "You know I was dead once already don't ya?"

It takes a while for the statment to process in the felines mind. He was already thinking about what horrible, twisted experiments he could use the dying fox for. The feline does however, pause and blink once or twice, "Wait, what?" Cheshire then exclaims, "Wait...you died once?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

Flicktail nod nods "aye i did...but I got better

"Well, obviously! It's the 'how' part of the story that I'm interested in." The cat excalimed once again, flailing his hands about before bringing them back to steeple his paws, "Do go on with your story, I just need to retrieve something from my bag..." The cat dissapears for a moment below the end of the bed and out of sight from the fox.

Flicktail says, "um..well I just..healed and wasn't dead no more.. but i did HAUNT a few beasts that tried ta use me fer an expirment..brought germs ta them"

"Yes yes, haunting and germs." THe cat said from where he crouched. The sounds of things being tossed about could be heard until Cheshire appeared again, this time holwing a rather large iron blade. It curved at the end and one edge was serrated. "Why don't we find out how you suvived, shall we?" As the cat advanced on the wounded fox he said witha slight cackle, "Tell me Flicky, do you have a preference to how I should...take this sample?

Flicktail says, "I dunno..will ithurt?' he asks with curious innocence"

The cat looks between the fox, and then the knife. Then again to the fox, and once more to the wickedly curved, serrated blade. "Not at all." He leaned forward, resting the blade upon fox's stomach, "Now hold...perfectly...still..."

Flicktail watches curiously "if it hurts I'm gonna tell!

Cheshire lines up the blade to aline going up and down with Flicktails underbelly. He lifts it once, before slowly lowering once again. Then raises it high and slashes it towards Flicktail!

Oh the humanity! The fox is cut open like a turky and foxy juices splatter the walls and...no wait, that didn't happen.

The cat instead cuts off a strand of fur from the fox. Lifting the fur up to the candle light Cheshire practically beams. "Success!" He shouts. "I theorize that the minerals that make up that sword of yours have yet to be discovered healing properties! If I melt this strand of fur down to it's base elements I can discover the secret to IMORTALITY!" The cat cackles loudly, loud enough to garner a paitent in the next room to shout, "Quite! We are trying to sleep in here!"

Flicktail says, "np no no..you aveto have TWO fus ta do at"

Flicktail says, "you need another ys daft feline"

"Oh! Yes, good point." Cheshire admits. Another harrowingly close slash at the fox, this time his arm, proceeds this comment. "Thank you Sir Flicktail. You have been most hopefull." Tucking the knife back into his bag Cheshire then adds, "Oh, and if this doesn't work I will have to open you up like a stuffed turkey and harvest your kidneys, you know, for SCIENCE!"

A moment passes by as Cheshire decides if more social interactment is needed. Feeling that his daily quota of fellow beastial interaction is completed he pats the fox on his good foot, "Well, sleep tight Flick. I'll most likely opperate on you in the morning." With that he retrieves his bag and heads out, leaving the horrible analog next to Flicks bed, just out of paw reach.

Flicktail says, "well if e be fer science..um will THAT hurt?"