Helping Hrsk 3

Picking up from the dramatic conclusion of part two, Raziel, Hrsk, and Dylan find out just how strange the customs of an underground lizard tribe can be...

Raziel stares, his jaw hanging open slightly. "I admit...that was impressive." He's...not terribly worried. The beast is still half his size, after all. But this might not be as easy as he was hoping... "Are there any other rules I should be aware of, Hrsk?"

The lizard nods, "Yes, DUCK!" he shouts as Hurrka comes flying through the air aiming a flying kick at the wild cats snout, "The only rule is you have to beat him to a pulp or kill him!"

Raziel does duck before Hrsk even has a chance to stop speaking! He has no serious desire to get kicked in the face. In a split second reaction as he dodges under the flailing reptile, the cat actually reaches for his sword - which...isn't there. Curses!

His opponent lands lightly and spins on his heal, sending a flurry of quick jabs towards the wild cat's side. While the two fight Dylan whispers to Hrsk, "What...exactly happened to your champion?" Hrsk shrugs, "Hurrka strangled him with his own tail." With a curt nod Dylan replies, "Oh kay..."

Raziel growls, "AH! Hey! Quit that!" The punches aren't super effective, but they're hard enough to be annoying, and painful in rapid succession. Raziel doesn't have much time to put together a proper plan of attack, so he does what seems like the most effective choice - he swings his fist down in a hay-maker, right to the top of Hurrka's head.

Hurrka takes a step backward clutching at his head. he shakes off the pain and instead of immediately attacking again he hisses in defiance at Raziel.

Raziel is having none of that! The big wildcat may not be as fast as the little psycho lizard, but he certainly has the advantage of reach! He counters Hurrka's counter attack...by punting the diminutive reptile.

The lizard makes a high pitched screech as he goes flying. Yes, his small frame gives him a good advantage of speed over the wild cat, it also makes it easer to send him flying farther, which he finds out when he crashes into the stone pillar behind him. The pillar, already worked over with age crumbles and breaks, its top half falling onto the floor next to the wall. The room goes silent as each and every jaw drops. They wait for Hurrka to rise...he lays crumpled on the floor. Pulling himself up to his knees then goes cross eyed and falls flat onto his snout.

Raziel is just as stunned as everyone else - though as soon as he realizes how far his own jaw dropped, he tries to recover before anyone notices. He turns about to face the crowd. "YES! I have bested your mighty champion! In addition to slaying countless of your warrior kin! And you have no idea what I'm saying, do you?! Haha!" Just because they can't understand him, doesn't mean he can't intimidate the crap out of them. He'd like to avoid having to fight the lizards...again. It's for their own good, really. "Now, will you all /please/ stop trying to kill me?!"

The lizards all stand in fear, in shock, in amazement. Even Dylan and Hrsk can not find the words to describe how they feel. And then the room is filled with cheering. The lizards all rush forward towards the victorious cat. Some pat him on the shoulder, others try to shake his paw, some even congratulate him.

Raziel blinks as the lizards all rush him, at first fearing that they've finally overcome their (completely rational) fear, and are going to tear him limb from limb. Then, when the pats and handshakes start rolling in, he figures out that the lizards are cheering...not making horrible battle cries. Hard to tell the difference, sometimes. "Hrsk...why do they love me now?!"

Hrsk replies happily, "Because you are the new champion of course. Speaking of which..." He shouts in his native language and all heads turn first to the Hrsk, then to his shorter, fatter, younger brother. Trsk gulps and attempts to flee from the crowd but alas, fails. He is pinned down, squirming and yelling and hissing as his gold jewelry is stripped from his body. They toss the discarded king to the side where he curls into a ball and begins to cry.

The tribe of lizards then brings the royal wear back towards their victors...and begin to throw it on Dylan?! Needless to say the thief is surprised as the crown is placed forcefully on his hat and he is lifted to the air under the tribe, carrying him out of the dueling grounds, "W-wait! What! HRSK!"

Raziel stares. "Hrsk...what did you do?! I thought you were supposed to take the throne again! Are they confused, or blind, or...?" The wildcat is absolutely astounded by the strangeness of tribal customs, sometimes...

In reply the tall but skinny lizard gives the cat a predatory grin, there is a hint of ambition behind his eyes as the pieces of his plan fall into place, "Funny thing. Once you are ousted from power here, you can no longer /be/ king. I couldn't let my dolt of a brother lead our people though, he has the leader ship skills of a pine cone. Only I can lead my people from ruin...which will be much easier now that I have signed on to be my long lost /brother's/ personal advisor and translator." he steeples his claws together and smirks, "Oh and thank you for your help by the way. Most impressive.

Raziel doesn't like being manipulated, and he gives the lizard a frown - though, now that he thinks about it...he did exactly what he was hired to do. Dylan was the one who was manipulated. And most beasts would kill to be a king. It's just...an odd turn of events. "That was...underhanded, Hrsk. Do you really know what you've gotten Dylan into?" The wildcat walks over to where his weapons lie on the floor, picking them up. Whoever was tasked with carrying them must have gotten caught up in the excitement. "Come on...let's go see what's happening." He pointedly ignores the sobbing Trsk.

"Oh I'm sure Dylan won't complain too much. It's rather hard to lead a tribe when they don't understand a word you say, that is why the job of translating /his/ orders will be left up to me." Hrsk explains. He is practically giddy with excitement and also ignores his weeping brother who is left literally with only the clothes on his back.

Following the procession back to the Great Hall The beasts encounter a large crowd of lizards, perhaps all of the tribe. The room is packed wall to wall with multi colored reptiles, most of which are red. The lizard of the hour sits upon the thrown with the gold below him. "Hrsk! Hrsk! What is going on!" he says in a completely terrified tone.

Raziel groans, and rubs his eyes. "Why don't /you/ go explain it to him, 'Grand Advisor'? I'm sure he'll be *thrilled* to hear what's going on." The wildcat obviously has no intention of backing the lizard up on his ruse. He was only paid to beat the crap out of a champion, after all. The best he can offer Dylan right now is moral support. The stripy feline starts to pick his way through the crowd, hoping the reptiles are still at least frightened of him to clear a path...

The 'advisor' folds his claws behind him and proudly marches up to the new lizard king. He leans forward and whispers into Dylan's ear. The look on Dylan's face goes from panicked to shock, to down right anger, "You little rat! You were planning this the whole time!" The lizards unaware of the trouble Dylan is spouting do part ways from the wild cat, this time in respect rather than fear. Apparently he has become an honored member of the tribe...

Raziel doesn't understand these diminutive, scaly beasts. One day, they're hissing obscenities at you, and attacking you in droves, the next you're everyone's favorite ChampionCat. Go figure. He walks up to Dylan, leaning against the throne - and picking up a rather tasteful silver ring from the jewelry pile below. Well, at least he knows he's getting paid. "Yep. This was Hrsk's plan all along, apparently..."

Dylan stares daggers at his fellow lizard, "I'll destroy you for this..." To this the lizard bows humbly, "Now now my king, you are in charge of this place. One doesn't stoop to killing beasts himself, that's what guards are for...assuming you can tell them to. How /is/ your lizard speak these days Dylan?" He chuckles, "Just smile and wave to the beasts around you Dylan and things will go well for you. All you have to do is sit, eat, spout nonsense every once in a while and I will take care of all the leadership things." Dylan hisses, "I...don't...WANT. To be king. I have a thieves guild to run blast it!"

Raziel is really starting to get irritated by Hrsk's smug attitude, but he's right...Dylan has no way to communicate with his other subjects. Well...except one. The wildcat grins. "I think you're forgetting a variable, Hrsk. I'm Dylan's new Champion, aren't I? And I seem to be able to understand him /juuuust/ fine. So maybe you should reconsider how you treat him, hmm?"

The smug attitude takes a blow but is quickly reinforced by the lizards next comment, "You...you wouldn't. You couldn't lead with out me here. Y-you would run the place into the ground with in a week and my people would tear you limb from limb!" Somehow Hrsk's carefully thought out argument doesn't have the desired effect. Dylan smiles first to Raziel, then to Hrsk. "I don't know, they seemed to follow your brothers with out too much complaint. They also didn't seem to give a fig when you were tossed out. I wonder what would happen if I ordered Raz to maul you." Hrsk swallows, trying very hard to keep his composure, "You wouldn't dare..." would they? he thinks.

Raziel nods, grinning like...well, Cheshire. "Indeed. Things seem to run themselves around here, even with an incompetent king. I think Dylan would get along fiiiine." The cat leans on his spear, crossing his legs as he stands. "And who knows? For enough gold, I might be willing to follow an order or two like one of King Dylan's subjects. But things don't have to come to that, now do they? As long as you /play nice/..."

"A...are you both mad!?" the lizard nearly shrieks. his protests seem to be missed by the cheering lizards around them. Dylan laughs with out mirth or mercy, "I'm sorry, I don't recall giving you the impression we were /sane/." He gestures to the cat behind him, "Raz, I don't know what lives in yonder pit but I am sure it could due for a good feeding..." Hrsk holds up his claws to protest, "W-wait. Fine, fine! You made your point." Dylan tilts his head to the side, "Good, now...so...I'm lizard king now right?

For once Dylan has absolutely no idea on what to do...he needs to get back to his forming thieves guild! Not play puppet king for some ex dictator, "Raz...I seem to have been given quite the amount of power. I am very tempted to have you punch Hrsk senseless..." he pauses considering the idea, "I don't know, what do YOU think I should do now?"

Raziel slowly turns to look at Dylan, having been giving Hrsk a predatory grin moments prior. "You want /my/ advice? I'm not an advisor, I'm a mercenary!" He looks back over to the conniving lizard, and thinks about it for a moment. "However...if I /was/ your weaselly advisor, I would recommend that you don't have your champion beat the scales off him on your first day in power. Just make it abundantly clear that you /can/. At any moment..." That should keep Hrsk in line for a while.

The weaselly lizard shies away from the two. This plan is starting to back fire so badly. Dylan for his part simply nods, "Good point. I'm afraid that what ever we do to clear up this mess it won't be happening in one night. For now I guess I'll just play the part...for now." He stands up from his thrown and shouts down to the crowded masses of hundreds and hundreds of lizards who look ready to leap at any order he gives...and suddenly wishes he was good at public speaking, "My fellow lizards! Let's have a feast!" The tribe continues to look at him oddly, with a sigh Dylan cringes, "Hrsk..." With a nod Hrsk replies, "On it..." Before hissing loudly to the tribe. The great hall erupts into a frenzy of excitement. Sitting back down Dylan shakes his head, "This...is going to be a LONG day..."