Bandits Day Off 3

“I have to admit Bandit, you seem to be taking this rather well.”

The badger takes the uneven woodland in surprising stride for one so large. Slade can only be described as burly with a thick hide covered in ratty garments. For one who specialized in making beasts into coats his clothing is in a shocking need of repair.

“I mean, I’ve seen beasts take it better than you of course but most beasts tend to at least show a little bit of apprehension at the thought of having their tummy cut open and their hide turned into a fancy scarf.”

The badger pauses to grimace at the fox behind him. Bandit for a creature so large is certainly NOT taking the uneven woodland well. He looks sickly, tongue hanging out the side of his mouth as he gasps for breath.

“And perhaps a coat…maybe two…” The badger sighs as the overweight fox collapses into the tall of grass of the clearing they were traveling through.

The grass was yellow and the trees around it were starting to lose their leaves. The fox was sure there was a metaphor in there that he could compare to his current life threatening problem but he was too tired to find it. With another sigh Slade stomps over to examine the fox. Deeming him well and truly spent the badger sits down on the earth not too far away, taking his own small break.

“Sorry to…disappoint you Slade…” Bandit says between gulps of air. Diet. A simple diet. Why didn’t he ever go on one? Just eat less meat. How hard was that? Or walk more around the village. “This isn’t the first time I’ve been taken by crazy people.”

“Now dun be insulting mate. I just plan to sell yer hide. That don’t make mai crazy, just a good businesbeast.”

“You know…I always knew it would end like this.” The fox rolls onto his side, still breathing deeply. His legs and feet feel like they are going to fall off and leave him here after all the walking they did. “Living by the sword an all that. I just…always knew I would meet my end either belly up with ale in the tavern or…or whatever this is.”

“Gutted like a fish?” The badger offered with a yellow, crooked smile.

“No. Monologue to death by an idiot.” Bandit sits up, glaring angrily at Slade, “If you were gonna just kill me and get it over with you would have done it days ago. Instead you are marching me up and down mossflower over hills and through woods. And after all this time you wonder why I’m not afraid to finally meet my end? Well I’ll tell you. I’ve had plenty of time to think it over and let me tell you, given the choice of being turned into a rug or listening to you prattle on for another minute, I choose being made into a rug!”

Bandit spits at the badgers feet. Perhaps it wasn’t the wisest move but he was angry, and truth be told he was scared. More scared than he has been in a long while. He was alone, in woodlands he had never been too, with a psychotic badger who planned to kill him, and he knew very well that in the end the fox was going to have to fight him to escape. Because if walking took such a toll on the guard then running from Slade was out of the question.

Narrowing his eyes Slade glances over the fox for a long, uncomfortable moment. He tilts his head back and smiles, “Well, I have to admit, the thought is temping. Unfortunately Fox hide doesn’t actually sell /that/ great. Not as much as you would think.”

Bandit raises an eyebrow, oh great…he got him monologing. Despite how sick with fear he is, a small part of him was hoping his comment had at least got Slade to shut up, finally.

Slade stands to his full height, arms crossed, still holding onto the rope that is looped around the fox’s neck. “Of course yers might sell for a little more. Maybe sell you to some beasts who cook foxes. But, in the end, it would only be pocket change.”

“You could always find a slave owner to sell me too.” Bandit crings at his own suggestion. Slade did as well.

“Please Bandit, I have standards.” Slade replies and then picks the fox up by the neck, easily lifting him to his feet by the scruff of his neck, “But there are other beasts who will pay a small fortune for me to hand you over to them alive.” Slade pats the fox on the head then spins him around and kicks him forward. Bandit yelps then stumbles. He offers the badger a hateful look before begrudgingly marching forward.

“Glad to see you enjoyed your break. Now get yer tail moving. We got a lot of ground to cover and not a lot of time. The buyers only come once a month and don’t stay too long…”

“And what happens if we miss them?”

“Then we will have made this trip for nothing. Which will make me angry. And you will be alone to take the brunt of my ire. And trust me fox. If you don’t like /honorable/ badgers when they are angry, just wait until you see what an /un honorable/ badger looks like when they get angry.”

The fox swallows. It’s about the only statement the badger made that the fox trusts to be true…